muffledfreethrowsinthedistance:

i didn’t do all the clans because shhh

Vampires: daylight savings is dumb as hell, who looks directly at the sun and says i want more of this for later, nobody does it

Camarilla: i don’t want to throw anyone under the bus here unless they are my enemy or betrayer or if it will help me get where i’m going faster

Sabbat: if history has taught us anything i dont plan to learn it

Anarchs: if anyone tries to tell you your dreams are unachievable just remember i have crashed my dirt bike into all 7 wonders of the world

Inconnu: tired of trying to figure out how to solve problems? try simply ignoring them forever instead

Assamites: stop being so defensive i am just trying to hit you with weapons

Brujah: i feel like if people respected me for the sheer stupidity of my actions i would get a lot more respect

Cappadocians: if anyone needs me i’ll be dead in my grave

Followers of Set: archaeologists have found hieroglyphs on the wall of a hidden chamber inside king tut’s tomb that confirms he was a damn bitch

Gangrel: people out of the know refer to death as a ‘dirt nap’ when in fact you can go to sleep on some dirt any time you want

Giovanni: honestly now that i have it this throne of human skulls is crazy uncomfortable to sit on

Lasombra: i don’t “say what we are all thinking” because my thoughts are always far more important and more interesting than everyone elses

Malkavian: being thinking about a lot of things lately and have decided thoughts are a waste of time

Nosferatu: in today’s and all other time’s housing market, a dirt cave is the best place to live

Ravnos: jewelry making tip; a simple can of gold spraypaint can turn a chicken nugget into a gold nugget

Toreador: yeah i looked both ways before crossing the street, i looked both 'handsome’ and 'radiant’, too bad i got hit by that car

Tremere: unsure of what to study? learn magic spells instead, its easy

Tzimisce: problem solving skills are well regarded but where is the respect for the problem creators such as myself

Ventrue: “everything isn’t always about you” i know that’s why i don’t care about anything

BONUS~ those crazy-ass fishman vampires: no song about living on land is as convincing as 'under the sea’ is about living on the ocean floor

vrepit-salt:

just-shower-thoughts:

2019 is going to be the midpoint in 1969 to 2069.

Not unpopular opinion but the right opinion

The camarilla is the one true governing body of all vampires and should be respects and acknowledged.

The sabbat are just mad men and paranoid zealots, while the anarchy are just spoiled children.

anachronic-cobra:

catchymemes:

This was so ridiculously drawn out and the conclusion was so obvious yet still I couldn’t tell where this was going

(Source: catchymemes)